My Hope

What is my hope in? Where does my joy come from?

I know the Sunday School answer is Jesus, but I want that to me so much more than a Sunday School answer. I want it to be true. Completely true.

I want my hope to be in Jesus above all else. Not in my job or the ability to budget my money well. Not in my marriage or the happiness I feel in it. These things were meant to point me toward Christ not to become their own God.

I’m fighting this in my life and I pray you are too. I don’t know what you think of when you think of what gives you the most joy in life, but I pray that it’s knowing Christ more intimately apart from all other things. I want nothing else to matter to me. By God’s grace, this can be made completely true.


Moving On

This has been a hard summer for me. I feel like I’ve wilted. I’ve let the world beat me down. I’ve let depression creep closer and fear and frustration weigh heavily.

No more. This is not the life I’ve been called to live. It’s not one of love or joy. I have not been given a spirit of fear. I don’t need to have this constant pit of anxiety about the future. My hope is secure. I am confident not in my own strength to get through the day, but in the strength of Christ to sustain me.

I still struggle. I face challenges that seem to break my spirit daily, but I have hope in a God that has not left me. He is with me in these plights and in Jesus I know He feels my pain. Yet, my struggles and challenges are soooo small compared to the daily challenges of many in the world. Instead of using my energy to fret about my life, I’m praying for others. Knowing that God is at work in all things and all things will be made new.


Where have I been?

I know, I know. My blogging is suffering majorly this year. I’ve been busier. My mind has been cloudier and I haven’t known what to say.

What I do know about this season is that God has been exceedingly abundant in grace in my life. I am so grateful for this season – even amidst the trials and even amidst the frustration and heartache God has faithfully provided for me more than I could ever dream. While he hasn’t made the season ahead much clearer, he has provided a hope that can not be vanquished and a confidence that can not be shaken.

I can rejoice with those who are pregnant in the season and yet long for the day I’ll be a mom with confidence in God’s timing.

I can endure in the midst of great frustrations trusting in God’s provision in my life in the last year and in the years to come.

I can long for the day when so many of my friends will be gathered together and I can rejoice in the fact that technology today allows me to keep up with so many of them while making new wonderful friends on the West Coast too.

I am so grateful for what God is teaching me in this season and for the ways I’m being challenged to grow and change and serve and lead. I continue to pray for change in my life and the life of others too.

Just a few thoughts from a jumbled mind. Back to regular blogging soon!